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Only You Decide- who Influences You

by Sanjeev Kotnala Share via -

Being human, it is natural to be influenced and influence others. We are societal animal with analytical skills and emotional levers. It makes the influencing easy. Sometime the influences are not positive in nature but powerful enough to get you off your focus. It is normally too late by the time realization hits. We ask ourselves questions and see patterns to blame everyone else but ourselves.

We know the answers and hence we fail to raise the right questions that may hurt. We fail to take a hard rational dive into the situation. What is the company I keep? Who are the people who can influence me? How have they been influencing me? Is the influence negative or positive? What have I learnt from these earlier instances of being influenced? Is the association right for me? What am I gaining out of these associations? How do I feel about such associations?

The answers were always there with us. Questions help to place them in the right perspective. Still they mean nothing till we are willing to act. The options are limited.

You can DISASSOCIATE. And the decision has to only yours. It is not easy to take such a step. As we have interlinked associations and dependences. If you must disassociate, do it as early as possible. It maybe the best decision you take affecting quality of your life. It is always a case of amputation and a corrective surgery.

STRENGTHEN the association. If it is a positive influence than it is natural that you should strengthen the association. Yu could spend more time with them. Learn more for them. Maybe willingly allow yourself to be influenced.

LIMIT association. It may be required in two cases. Sometime it is not easy to disassociate so you could decrease the level of association. You maybe unsure of the nature of association hence you may want to test the association.

There is no point in saying that your time and effort investment should be skewed toward the positive influences. You must be clear that the degree and quality of influence are two different elements.

INVEST to EXPAND associations. Find other successful people and invest time with them. Learn from their actions and statements. Better and success are contextual and comparative in nature. Do not just focus in professional success to learn, learn in every sphere. Physical, emotional, mental, family, married life – find people who have been good in the filed and associate with them.

BRING PURPOSE in your associations. Creating a wider set of positive influencers and getting to be on their side. It is the purposeful influencing. A willingness to be positively influenced by people you have hand picked and built your association.

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